Paladin's Perspective

" Dedicated to the Law Enforcement, Military, & First Responder Perspective"

Anger:  Did you know that anger is important to our survival?  It is a primitive, often automatic response mechanism that can help us deal with dangerous situations.  The problem is that it will trigger during non-dangerous circumstances.  Anger may trigger automatically but we don't have to bend to it's effects.  We are the ones who decide how to repond to these primitive feelings.  Every time you have an anger outburst it was you who decided to give in and blow up.  No one can keep a lid on their anger all the time but there are ways to reduce it's impact on our lives.
Anger Management Strategies for "Us"

#1: Understand that anger is a “choice”

#2: Think about the biology of what’s going on and adapt psychologically.

 

#3: Manage people and situations through respect and attitude (not through domination or other use of anger)

 

       - Attitudes precede skills and reactions

          “ He who feels the respect which is due to others cannot fail to inspire in them regard for himself, while he who feels

               and hence manifests, disrespect toward others, especially his inferiors, cannot fail to inspire hatred against

               himself”                                                                    (Major General John M Schofield)

       - Don’t evoke anger in others unnecessarilyRead then react. 
       - Understand the person’s motivation before determining your reaction to them or what they say.

#4: Become more resilient and less vulnerable


        - Don’t take things personally.  Do not let others control your response. 
        - Imagine you are being filmed before responding (you might be)Be safe before all else. 
        - Do what you need to do then reassess and revise as necessary


#5: Think tactically about your anger.  Practice your response to various situations, persons and circumstances. 
 

         - Use your anger to your advantage or suppress it in an appropriate way
     

#6: Reduce physical arousal after anger appears

        - Deep breaths/Relax muscles/Calm Thinking

#7: Reduce stress on and off the job

        - Stress  increases susceptibility to anger
        - Utilize stress reduction strategies

#8: Know yourself and your triggers (hot buttons) well

       - “That which is not worked out will be acted out”   (John Bradshaw)

       - Identify the triggers and remove their power over your self control
       - Seek the source for these triggers and understand them.
       - Write down the circumstance and its meaning to you.
       - Self examination and understanding your past and why you think the way you do.

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Adapted from "The Anger Management Sourcebook", Schiraldi, G.R., Hallmark Kerr, M., 2002